The Terrifying Magic of Public Reading
If you’ve ever stood in front of an audience, a paper shaking in your hand as your equally shaky voice reads something you’ve poured your heart and soul into, then welcome to the club: you’ve done a public reading.
Until these last few years, the scenario above was an accurate description of my public reading experience. Despite being an extrovert and an English teacher who was reading aloud to 80+ students a day, I quickly realized that reading my own fiction out loud was an entirely different beast. For me, there was no mystery as to why: it was a confidence thing; I could no longer prop myself up on the words of Fitzgerald and Steinbeck like I could in my high school classes. For better or worse, it was now my words, in all their imperfect glory, being projected to a room full of listeners.
My first experiences of reading my fiction in front of an audience came during my MFA program. These readings were done on a volunteer basis, wherein students would sign up to read in front of roughly eighty to a hundred people (including world-renowned authors) for three to five minutes. Regretfully, it wasn’t until my third semester when I finally mustered enough courage to do a reading, and I’m not saying this in a self-deprecating way: I didn’t do a great job. I stumbled over words several times, my voice was quivering, and my pace was off. But, I’d finally faced my lingering fear, and it made a monumental difference in my writing journey.
Fast forward another semester, and I found myself volunteering to read once again, only this time, things were different. Seeing my obvious anxiety an hour or so before my reading, an author friend of mine pulled me aside and, in a nutshell, told me to get my shit together. This guy was a phenomenal reader and performer, so I was all ears. The gist of his pep talk went beyond the whole “project your voice like you’re speaking to the person on the back row” thing. He instilled confidence in me. He reminded me that my words were unique and important. He told me that the audience wanted me to succeed and that they wanted to hear my words. Then, he offered me some more practical advice that I could put into immediate practice. He told me to fully take in the audience when I took the stage—look them in the eye and smile. He also warned me, sternly, to never degrade my own work in front of said audience. As he put it: If the first thing you tell them is how shitty your work is, they’ll probably believe you.
Half an hour later, I applied those words of wisdom, and while my reading wasn’t mind-blowing, it was significantly better than the time before. Unsurprisingly, the reading after that one was even better. It’s like any endeavor: repetition is key. The more you do it, the better you get.
Since becoming an author, I’ve done a dozen or more public readings, including at three universities where I had the honor of being a featured speaker. Do I stumble over my words at times? I do. Do I get nervous as hell before taking the stage? Yep, but not with the same dread I once had; now, it’s more of an excited brand of nervousness. The truth is, what once frightened me is now my favorite thing to do.
The reason I’m telling you this is because reading in front of others will benefit your writing in more ways than you can imagine. Here’s how:
1. At the most basic level, when reading your work out loud, your ears will pick up on things your eyes can’t, especially when it comes to sentence flow. Those parts that you tripped over during your public reading might have little to do with your nerves: it most likely has to do with the words you put on the page. (also: nobody gives a damn if you screw up a few words…they’ve done it too, OR, if they do give a damn, it’s because they don’t have the guts to read in front of others)
2. Reading in front of people gives you beta readers you never even signed up for. This goes beyond gauging an audience’s reception of your work. There may be a detail you include that someone in the audience can constructively critique. I can name two instances when fellow authors have approached me with helpful advice after I read from a rough draft. Once, an author who had done extensive research on ballistics, gave me invaluable advice on a scene involving a shootout. Another time, S.A. Cosby approached me after a Noir at the Bar and gave me some pointers on how bodies are prepared at a funeral home (this tidbit about cosmetic fees actually made it into my novel.)
3. It helps you promote your work, and I don’t mean just selling books. In the limited readings I’ve done, I’ve been approached by librarians, booksellers, and bloggers that I would’ve never met otherwise. In fact, I have a big event scheduled later this year that wouldn’t be on my calendar had the event coordinator not been in the audience for one of my readings.
4. It gives you confidence. This is the most important benefit in my opinion. The more confident you become reading in front of others, the more confident you become when you sit down to write. If I were to draw a Venn diagram and list the best writers and the best readers/performers I know, most of those names would intersect. I assure you it’s not a coincidence.
I’m not saying it’s easy. It wasn’t for me. We all have different anxieties for different reasons when it comes to reading in front of others, but I can assure you, if you’ve never done it before, it’s an experience that can change your journey.
Your words matter. People love reading them. They would really love to hear them.
All best,
Scott
